Midlife Mom Crisis?

I've grown restless with my blog design and in an effort to personalize it, I've stumbled across a sort of crisis. I wanted to put some pictures of things that sort of define me or at least illustrate my interests and hobbies. Why do I draw such a blank?

I feel very happy right now in my life. I enjoy my kids so much - they are so often doing things that make me look at them and think, "I have such a nice family" and "Wow, I am really so lucky." I look at the things that I do in a typical day. A large amount of my time is spent feeding people and getting them to sleep. I am constantly behind in my housework. I have discovered that I am much poorer at keeping a clean house than I have previously given myself credit for. It is SO easy for me to put off cleaning when Ryan asks me to read him a book or it's a perfectly clear blue sky outside. I rarely get a break from being "Mom" but I'm also SO invested in the lives of my children that I cannot justify regular time away from them. This is why I cannot come up with a single hobby or interest. Well, that's not entirely true. I cannot come up with an un-pathetic interest. I am often thinking about what to feed my family. Is food an interest of mine? I am always looking for a good deal. Am I a shop-a-holic? I like to read. Who doesn't? Am I doing anything to broaden my horizons? Strengthen my character? Take opportunities for some "Me" time? Not often. Do I have any market-able skills? Do I scrapbook, sew, paint, knit, garden? Not really. I sound very pathetic to myself.

Maybe it comes from moving to a new place and becoming acclimated. I hope to discover something new about myself in the near future. Something positive, something interesting. I'd like to discover what might be a strength for me or some kind of talent that I can actually invest some energy in. Though frankly, I have sure learned a thing or two about myself since becoming a parent. I am not exactly main-stream which has actually surprised even me at times. Still, parenting seems to make us own up to our inconsistencies. I think differently than I did before. Maybe what I really want to be is this unselfish person who is more concerned about my children and their needs and their identities than my own. The rest will work itself out. Maybe in losing myself, I will find myself.

In the meantime... how do I pick some pictures for my blog header that seem to illustrate who I am? (rhetorical question)

Twinners

Grandma got the girls matching PJ's. I had to take about 45 pictures to get this one. Katie kept crawling away and would shriek when I'd pick her up and put her next to Evie. Evie doesn't like loud noises (Katie) and would cry whenever Katie screamed. But you must admit, this one is pretty cute.

They are pretty much the same size. Katie is slightly taller, Evie is slightly heavier, but they look pretty similar to me. Evie has 6 teeth, Katie just popped out her 4th. We are excited for NEXT Christmas with these girls together. Should be so much fun!

Amarylis

Due to my past performance as a houseplant owner, Derek seriously questioned my ability to keep this beauty alive. I must say that he underestimated the power of a window box. This pretty thing began as a bulb on Halloween. Now, 2 months later she has become a full blown Amarylis. I enjoyed growing her so much that I decided that this was the right gift for Derek's assistant at work. (Don't worry Mom, I DIDN'T get her coasters). Hers are Hyacinth bulbs though and should turn out equally beautiful.

Are you taller than a Zebra?

I found this fun growth chart at a teacher supply store. I thought it was a fun way to brighten up our house and also keep track of how the kids are growing. It also has those cards on the side which let you compare how tall you are to five other animals. You might be able to find the line which indicates how tall Ryan is. He is taller than a cheetah, but shorter than a python (from tail to head). Is anyone else surprised that a flamingo is taller than a Zebra or Wildebeest? I sure was. Katie doesn't have a line yet, but she's about where the lines start on the giraffe. Shorty!

For Gina:

I was seriously contemplating getting some for you, but I had no idea you wanted the giraffe. I thought you were going for more like this.

If you need these then I'll bring them to Phx for Christmas for you. Just say the word and I can go back and get more for myself later.

Gift Idea

Anyone know of a good gift idea for Derek's assistant at work? We really don't know much about her interests. She is about 25, is not married and doesn't have any kids. We need something not too personal but at least semi-classy since he works at a law firm. I'd take any suggestions at this point. I would prefer NOT a gift card.

Well, let's just say that #1 she is probably going to get gifts for our kids. #2 Probably some of the attorneys in the office will get their assistant gifts in the $100 range (to put that in perspective, that would be the partners who have been working there a LONG time and who have more than triple Derek's salary). I am hoping to get something in the $20-$25 range. Something sort of like these coasters.
I know they are coasters. Is that SO dorky? Feedback please.

I like how she's clutching his shirt.

Working on our year's supply

November's goal - 14 gallons of water storage per person. Ta da!! Meet our new 55 gallon water storage barrell (complete with pump and wrench). We finally decided on a place to put it (since we won't be moving it around much once it's filled) but we need to actually put water in it. It doesn't do us much good when it's empty.

Also displayed is an emergency food supply from Costco that says it is 275 servings. Not bad for a 10 gallon bucket! I can't really say that it's "health food", but it will keep us alive in an emergency. It also has a 20 year shelf life so we don't have to rotate that very often. If we each had 3 servings a day it wouldn't meet our calorie requirements, so it's really supplemental food, but it's a start!

There is no emergency preparedness goal for December but I can't wait for January. I am glad that we are in a position to follow the prophet in this manner (not so glad that we're in an area that is prone to earthquakes where we might actually have to USE this stuff.)

*clarification* There are different food packets in the bucket - it's not like a bucket of grits. It has 55 packets (5 servings each) and you boil the stuff in water. Our menu choices: Barley Vegetable, Blueberry Pancakes, Ala King, Cacciatore, Country Noodle, Corn Chowder, Rice Lentil, Western Stew, Whey Milk, and Potato Ba-kon (which is a way of saying vegetarian bacon I think.)

Disneyland Report

Well, the first thing that all you Disneyland goers with small children should know; don't take your two year old on Mr. Toad's Wild Ride first thing. In fact, you probably would be better off not taking him on it at all. It made Ryan pretty sceptical about the whole Disneyland experience - right from the beginning.

Let's zoom in on those "happiest place on earth" sort of expressions!

Let's see, maybe flying Dumbo will fix things and restore his faith in Disneyland. Yeah, he liked that pretty well. Katie was indifferent about EVERYTHING. It looks like I'm having tons of fun on Dumbo though.

Carousel was a success. (We could have taken him to Arrowhead Mall and spent a few bucks on that one.)

We tried Toon town and that went over well. Minnie Mouse has a plate of holographic "diet" cookies on her kitchen table and he tried for a long time to get one of those. I kept badgering Derek to take pictures of Ryan on the cars and a fire engine and trolley and such, but for some reason, there are none of those on my camera.

He liked the Disneyland railroad - even the dinosaur part. He is definitely in a train stage right now. (I realise the picture is not convincing.)

Autopia was also a big hit. Derek helped him get started but Ryan steered the rest of the time. It was a wild ride. Anyone else want to guess what color car they drove? I promise they only went once.

We went over to California Adventure to catch the Aladdin show that Devin went to last year. He had really enjoyed it so we thought we'd give it a shot. Ryan loved it even though there was a scary *Jafar turns into a big fat red snake* part. In fact, we asked him afterwards which part was his favorite and he said, "the BIG snake." It was quite entertaining. The genie was cracking jokes about Jafar when he rubbed the lamp and said, "Slytherin house for sure." I got a laugh out of that one.

Ryan liked that he could fold himself in half in the chairs. *Jimmy, don't read this next part* I was nursing Katie (VERY discreetly I might add) and we were in our own row on the end when this group of people came and sat next to us. After a minute or two they actually LEFT because I was nursing. That's never happened to me before and I swear that I wasn't being all flashy about it!

Ryan DID get to see Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Goofy, Max (Goofy's son who waved to him), and Santa Claus. He wasn't interested in touching or talking to any of them, but he did wave every time. We never saw Sulley walking around, but we DID go on the Monster's Inc. ride the very last thing. It was a slow-moving ride and not too loud so it was just perfect for a kid who knows the characters and all. He would wave every time we saw Sulley and Mike and Boo and Celia Welia (as we always call her). At the end of the ride was Roz and she said, "In case you didn't realize, I'm standing under the mistletoe." Ryan scooted over to the edge of the seat as far from her as possible. :)

When it was over I asked him if he liked that one and he said, "Yeah, and I wasn't even nervous!" Whew!

"What was your favorite part about Disneyland Ryan?"
"That one," he said, pointing to Monster's Inc.

Yes, it's still such a love/hate relationship.

We got in the car and took the kids over to a babysitter's house and made it back late for our dinner. The park had already closed but luckily we found a reasonable guy who knew about our group and escorted us back in so we wouldn't miss out on our meal. We sat across from a HILARIOUS couple who entertained us the whole meal. Now how's that for lucky?

Yeah, I could taste this one.

In Katie's defense, she looked just as surprised as I was about the whole thing. She just does NOT ever spit-up. Who am I? My mother?

We're going to Disneyland!!

We were invited to a dinner at California Adventure (compliments of Derek's firm) which includes 2 adult park hopper passes for this Thursday. We are making it a family outing since our kids are still free. Derek was hyping up Disneyland to Ryan this evening and told him he could drive a car and meet Mickey Mouse. At night before bed tonight Ryan said, "We're going to Disneyland and I'm going to meet Mickey Mouse and drive his car. Maybe he has an airplane." Ha! This kid is no dummy. He's planning to take Mickey for all he's worth.

The car thing reminded me that I had these pictures of Ryan driving our neighbor's Hummer. He LOVES this thing!

The Unexpected

I know you all will want to tell me that it won't last, he'll go back to his old ways soon enough. Don't bother. I don't really CARE. I'm still shocked and very pleased by the recent turn of events. I realize this sort of thing ebbs and flows, but I am at least going to be happy with yesterday and today.

Ryan has potty trained himself.

Well, at least starting on Wednesday afternoon he decided he wanted to start going potty in the toilet. He went 4 times in a row and then went to bed. Thursday he woke up and announced that he wanted to wear his "big boy underwear" (which he only has one pair) and so I let him. He went potty ALL DAY long in the toilet with only one miss. I never even suggested that he use the toilet, he would tell me every time. I'd say, "Do you want to go read some books?" and he'd reply, "After I go potty in the toilet and get a potty treat." Yes, he does get a treat every time. He's had TONS of candy the past two days, but I haven't had to clean up the floor even one time and I don't remind him AT ALL to use the potty.

We were playing outside with one of his friends on Thursday and when we were going home I asked him if he wanted a snack. He said, "After we go to the store and buy me some big boy underwear." Yes sir! We hopped right in the car and bought him the ones he chose, Thomas the Tank Engine and some boxer briefs.

Too good to last? Maybe. So what!? I'm still impressed with him - so there! I wouldn't mind at all if he decided he wanted to wear diapers again. He's still pretty young to be potty trained anyway, but the past few days have shown me that he CAN be potty trained. whew!